Wednesday, January 27, 2010

terasa.....

Tumb up everyone....

Hari ni tak tau kenapa, terasa sangat dengan keadaan yang berlaku depan mata,

dari minggu lagi 'terasa' perasaan mcm ni, sejak 'tertinggal' tu,
semalam g makan tengahari, ader jugak rase terasa,

kenapa tk leh hilang rasa pedih kat dlm hati ni eh,
kenapa asyik terasa jer ni,
nk kater period dah sudah... tak der plak PMS bagai...

mungkin ader sebab yg aku sendiri blom pasti...

one of my friends kata maybe diorg nk pay a respect and professionalism in work...
tapi tak kan sampai nmpak kita buat2 tk perasan, n withot saying gud morning ker... hi ker...
cam dulu-dulu....

boleh berjanji makan sama-sama... bercerita sama2,
menhulur bantuan sama-sama, paling tidak pun, senyum , andai abis bahasa dibibir...
mungkin nmpak cam masalah paling kecik ni , masih ade sampai sekarang tk approve friends, tapi
aku sendiri tak tau kenapa aku terasa sangat....

bila kita bertentang mata, mata - mata ini akan lari seolah2 melarikan diri atau mungkin menyembunyikan sesuatu,

aku juga bukan insan sesempurna malaikat, tapi aku bersedia untuk terima teguran atas kesilapan yang mungkin telah melukakan hati mereka,

namun aku tidak pandai hidup dalam pura-pura, seolah2 aku tidak faham perubahan yg berlaku,

marah mungkin, mula menbenci mungkin, mula meluat mungkin, tapi sampai biler...
aku perlu bersama berkawan bekerja... dan mahu ingin rase ikhlas bersama dgn yg lain,

aku ingin, tapi tak tau nk mohon maaf dgn siapa?
aku mahu, tapi tak tau nk mohon ampun bagaimana..
aku tk tau biler aku nk mintak maaf....

sebab aku takut ini akan lagi menambahkan jurang yg ader...
layak ker aku untuk jadi sebahagian di kalangan mereka...

Mungkin ini hanya mainan perasaan kan..
atau mungkin petanda yg aku tidak perlu ader dengan 'dunia' ini

aku perlu lebih terbuka untuk terima keadaan yg sebenar
menerima hakikat peng'asing'an yang mereka cuba tunjukkan..

insya'Allah,
aku harap sgt perkara ini berlalu dan tidak menganggu perjalanan seharian disini setiap hari..
aku perlu hidup yg lebih mengembirakan hati dan keadaan yang lebih baik...

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Adam after 10 month...



My little Son Shine....

makin hari semakin mencabar jadi mak kepada Encik Muhammad Adam Bin Mohd Farid ni...

dah pandai mimik...

dah pandai mengeleng kepala kalau tk nk...

berguling cam guli time nk pakai diaper..

Weekend at Kuala Gandah

Last weekend, once Mr Husband finish clean up the house at Damai, i proposed... i repeat, proposed, to spent a nite at Nurain's house in Lanchang...
Yeay.... we did it.. Adam visiting mak teh...

The house is actually in the IKBN Temerloh, so when we 1st enter the gate, need to drop the IC, register, like we are sending Adam to a Hostel, ...hmmm, maybe next 15 years lagi kot...

a very pleasant area, greene, and.. its a Quarters..
even myself n mr husband not a Govt Servant, tonite we experience the 'stay' feeling...
in a Govt Quarters.
Haa.... next day, a sunny Sunday... Nurain brought us to Kuala Gandah, to 'meet' the elephant,
we when to Deer Land, ... Adam enjoyed the trip much more then his parent,

Adam, 1st time in life, touch the Sun Bear, Deer, Elephant, and many more, i forgot to recharge the camera....

Adam loves all the 'furry' animal

of course all know what to be the best lunch in Pahang... the famous ikan patin masak tempoyak la kan...

Sedap .... tapi pedas..... must try the Ais jagung..

Monday, January 25, 2010

January 2010

january's ending....

Nothing much exciting happens..

May Allah always bless my family,
my heart feeling getting worse... and i done know why,
when i kept thinking there's nothing... yet i am still worry..

Ya Allah ampunilah dosa-dosa hambamu ini,
dosa ku dan suami ku, ibu bapa dan adik ku,
Aku mohon kau lindungilah kami sekeluarga dari sebarang kecelakaan,
berilah kami kemudahan dalam menjalani hidup seharian...

Ya Allah ya tuhan yang Maha mengampuni dan Maha Mengasihani,
tenangkan la jiwa ini, untuk menempuh hari-hari esok,
Amin Ya Rabbal Alamin...

Monday, January 18, 2010

Something... somewhere...

need a break ... or need to break....

haha... i dont feel like am going to 'break' at the moment,
it is just a 'tired' feeling..
or it is just an emotional issues...
or perhaps too much frustration.... maybe...

i need new fresh air...to filter all the ruined mode...
maybe yes.. may be no...

some had betrayed me, some had smiled to me..
some had hates me more.. some had support me...

but for one reason, its only me here.. to decide..
yes friendship never end.. but what make u strong is sometimes is who made u cried...

Friday, January 15, 2010

Adam's 1st family holiday to Langkawi...





















A langkawi trip a.k.a 1st family trip with Adam...

enjoyed the moment with my mother,
its like a pay day for her coz baby sat Adam for about 2 weeks.

Friday, January 08, 2010

2009 entires...

hehheh.... it's been a year.... i 've betrayed my own promises to myself ...
wanna be a good blog writer? or at least a discipline blog writer.....

few things happen....
few events happen....
few love, sad, anger .......etc....

i m trying to summarize all in one...
aci tak?

i made my word to give a 'commitment' to this blog in October...
Worse is - Celcom Berukband rosak since 22nd October 2009...
Macam maner i tk bengang with this problem...

then, busy with Fauzi's wedding...


then with the IEYD Convocation .....

the meeting .... the planning.... the team....

Then ain & wan' wedding












































Then... after ain's wedding..... Raya Aidil Adha, poor thing Adam has to be at Muar with my mum..

My husband have to lead the family to Terengganu for Ain's Reception on the same date as the Convocation day... taking the consideration of a sacrificial to family and work...
we've decide to 'give' Adam time to be spent with his Tok Mak.....
while my self busy with the planning..preparation..and event day..